Clik here to view.
HBO
Every so often, someone will edit an NFL game down to just football action. No commercials, no TV timeouts, no huddles, no halftime, only actual plays, which trims three hours down to a neat 11 minutes. That’s kind of how True Detective felt in its second season. But with staring.
Or to quote Frank, “You bang down my door for a staring contest?” Here’s my impression.
*stares* *continues staring* *eye twitches, but still stares*
Existence is a toilet, and we’re the piss.
*stares some more*
The dialogue and action happened between angry stares, not the other way around. It was the moody equivalent of scaring someone by unexpectedly jumping out of a closet; they were frightened more out of instinct than because you did anything chilling. My original plan was to see, of the Big Four (Ray Velcoro, Ani Bezzerides, Paul Woodrugh, and Frank Semyon), who spent the most time staring this season, but it was quickly apparent that Frank was the runaway winner. Instead, I kept track of all the furious, silent stare scenes, and who they were between.
There were other moments of intense gazing, often between Ani and Ray, but those don’t count, because they were more likely to lead to sex (which they did!) than murder.
Ray vs. questions about his son
Clik here to view.
HBO
Woodrugh vs. Lacey
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ani’s sister vs. Ani
Clik here to view.
HBO
Straight Woodrugh vs. gay Woodrugh
Clik here to view.
HBO
Osip vs. Frank
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Ray
Clik here to view.
HBO
Woodrugh vs. wind
Clik here to view.
HBO
Everyone vs. everyone
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. water stains
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Ray, part two
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ray vs. Ray’s dad
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. penis
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Ray, part three
Clik here to view.
HBO
Stan vs. not dying
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Santos
Clik here to view.
HBO
This guy vs. Frank
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Roy from The Office
Clik here to view.
HBO
Woodrugh vs. Lacey, part two
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. the Mexicans
Clik here to view.
HBO
Woodrugh vs. his mom
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Ray, part four
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ray vs. prisoner
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ray’s son vs. not watching Friends
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. the Mexicans, part two
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ani vs. BOB from Twin Peaks
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Ray, part five
Clik here to view.
HBO
Nothing is f*cking vs. everything is f*cking
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. Blake
Clik here to view.
HBO
Woodrugh vs. blackmailing
Clik here to view.
HBO
Ray vs. Lenny
Clik here to view.
HBO
Frank vs. the Mexicans, part three
Clik here to view.
HBO